narwhal-noir:

I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

hella-rad-mofo:

makepatronusesnothorcruxes:

astreetcarnamedthetardis:

me during movies where 99% of the population of earth dies

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me during movies where a dog dies

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TOO SOON

legalmexican:

this bitch

germanyisgay:

teenscoolest:

OMG I CANT STOP LAUGHING

germanyisgay:

teenscoolest:

OMG I CANT STOP LAUGHING

ladyleigh89:

Emily Heller (x)

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

ya know that kid whos at the arcade and is just watching the demo for a game but they’re pressing the buttons like they’re playing?? well that’s how i’m handling adulthood so far

realniggaannouncements:

I had a dream last night that Jesus finally resurrected and when white people found out he wasn’t white they arrested him for 2000 something years of tax evasion  

rnackenzie:

i wanna respect everybodys opinion but some peoples opinions are just so terrible